BLACK COCKTALE

By @OlamideAdeyemo

’9-year old girl raped to death… by a 14-year old… in Ikorodu area of Lagos.’

Local media, on the 10th of November 2013 ravaged my rabbit-like hearing organs with this strange piece of information. One that alternates easily between grief and amusement. The most shocking bit was the young rapist-cum-murderer’s tale of the free sex tutorials he had obtained from the series of x-rated materials he had access to; and his attribution of his ‘tabooic’ offence to them. He saw what he felt was fun (and can be when rightly done), ‘mastered’ its art and decided to confirm his newly gained expertise. He found an unconsenting ‘guinea pig’ or ‘lab mouse’ and the rest is news.

Questions arise: Where were the adults when he was carrying out the act? Was there no parental supervision to squash his ‘unadult’ consumption of ‘adult’ content? How was the victim tamed? Regardless of how, where and when the ‘coitus’ happened, a fact remains glaring. Pornography has ceased to be a content for the ’18 and above’. It has become commonplace like cigarettes that advertise ‘not for sale to persons under 18′ but available for toddlers and infants to buy, light, puff and pass. Think I’m kidding? Engage your visibly 13-year old sibling in an errand of ‘porn purchase’ and spit right into my eyes if he doesn’t deliver the goods. With an accompanying sense of pride. Or better still, inquire if he hasn’t seen naked humping adults ‘oooooh-ing’ and ‘aaaaaah-ing’ in rhythmic movements as if they were working as back-up dancers for Fally Ipupa. Or dancing to Timaya’s latest release ‘ukwu’.

 Eleven. Yes, eleven is the average age that kids view pornography. Kids are exposed to the skills their genitals can display before their brains can process ‘sexmatics’ and its consequences. They are bombarded with loads of sexual messages via the media, internet and some video games even before their awareness of serious issues like the use of contraceptives, condoms and infections. They act what they see like it were some Indomie advert for the Indomitables (I still wonder what Indomie was thinking).

Yet to have a kid but I am planning. Rigorously plotting that we (including that lucky lady who will share my life and bed forever) beat the odds of our male progeny’s exposure to an unemotional ‘kpa-kpa-kpa’ at a vulnerable stage of his childhood only to discover that uncle Jack’s hidden magazines, discs or laptop videos can transform him into an adult monster with no regards for the opposite sex or worse, become a slave to his desires. An outcome it will kill me to see.

10-year old ‘……. Adeyemo’ (no first name yet but certain of the last), despite the skepticism displayed by the society in thinking you are far too young to hear these, heed the words of thy father.

Porn as an industry makes more revenue than the combined revenues of professional football, baseball and basketball franchises. The ‘actors’ are really actors. They make ‘adults only’ movies for money. Sex in the real world shouldn’t. The moment it does, you are doomed. The guilt watching it is huge, imagine the result of being the showman. Or woman.

This ‘genitalian battle’ isn’t as easy as painted. The oral and anal transactions; the weird positions; and the moans and groans are all false. These vessels of lust are trained to playact every possible human fantasy. And believe me kid, we have a lot of crazy ideas in the vault of our minds. Porn actors use certain drugs (mostly hard ones like cocaine), surgeries (liposuction, breast and organ increments) and performance enhancers so as to pull some of those jaw-dropping sexual stunts. Imagine a shaved anus before an anal scene, how many people wake up to suddenly shave that part? I hope you don’t see them. Their false message is synonymous to the fictional ‘man of steel’. No one is a superman. Porn is a fiction. A morally disastrous one.

It was recently discovered that four American porn superstars had HIV. If they could have tested positive in the most ‘procedural’ nation on earth having undergone series of tests before they were employed to have unprotected penetration (even the mouth has been implicated in certain infectional spread), imagine what happens in the real world? One dominated by indiscipline, lack of control and sex-craze? An indepth dimension here is the possibility that each one of the infected sexual gymnasts had played certain roles with some, say 20 other uninfected screen colleagues who might have become same as a result. Calculations will lead to thousands; on and off set. Boy, sex isn’t as safe as those contents portend!

The use of women as worthless instruments of pleasure can be damaging. Never perceive the opposite sex as tools. Either of pleasure or egocentrism. It weakens you as a man and makes you vain. Your mother is one I love and like other girls you will meet, they are real beings with emotions. Sex is an emotional endeavor. Little wonder that its outcome is life. Something like you. Actually, someone. Don’t waste this special gift in the shadow of a mirage called ‘BF’ (the film of the sky’s colour).

And my son, sex is spiritual. It connects souls. Its intimacy is the peak of any human physical interaction; making it an entrance into something ‘ultra-physical’. Exactly why certain religions use it in the worship of their gods.

Run, boy! Run! We (including yourself) won’t have to worry about increasing medical bills to treat your sexual diseases, the emotional hurt, an abortion-gone-wrong or a weird sexual activity gone-bad (like the Asian couple reported dead just last month after they fell through the window of a tall hotel facility during daring sexual gimmicks). Should your curiousity get the better part of you (an occurrence I am hoping happens not), always remember that it is just fiction. Just like you will not try to spin webs after an episode of Spiderman, use your head. And conscience.

 In the words of the World Wrestling Entertainment, do not TRY this at home. Or anywhere else. That is what that porn picture, or video tells you. Unfortunately, indirectly.

‘What my 10-year old daughter will know about porn’ is next.

*Statistics used have been derived from a number of reputable sources including Alexa Research, NRC, PBS, WordTracker, Google, and MSNBC as obtained from www.familysafemedia.com/pornography_statistics.html